Instead of using it as a way to learn and become better or doing things better.
There were times in my life I was living the lifestyle I couldn’t afford just because I wanted to fit in and lived like so and so. You see, the so and so had the income to afford to live that kind of lifestyle that I was also living, but I didn’t. And it’s not like I was living in denial, really, it’s not like I didn’t know, but I guess I didn’t care. I wanted to fit in so bad to the point where my financial decisions were ruining my life. So, I got myself in debts that I wished I never had and all because I was comparing myself to others without thinking of the consequences. I hated where I was heading, but pride took hold of me, and because of that I ended up in a messed up situation.
Since it took me a long time to recover from my comparison mistakes, that’s it all it took for me to learn. Let’s just say it was what I needed to learn the lesson in the bad and hard way of course.
This is why even today, when I visit other websites in my circles that have an average of 300 comments and likes for each of their posts I don’t feel disheartening. Because I know when comparison becomes more of competition, to the point you want to do things to manipulate situations, instead of learning from the people and businesses you are comparing yourself to, you can get yourself in worse situations that have no good end results.
If you happen to be a person who is suffering from comparisonitis, there are four things you need to know that can help you overcome this condition in your personal, relational, business, or career life, and so on.
1. Do not compare your beginning to someone else’s middle.
Especially when you have no idea what their journey is all about. You don’t know what they have been through, and what they have done to get where they are that you wish to be. The fact is the struggles they went through maybe different from yours.
It’s easy to lose confidence in yourself and give up when you compare your beginning to someone else’s middle. They also started somewhere, and what you see are the results of their efforts in persisting on things and determined to achieve their dreams and goals.
At least you are also doing something to better your life, and perhaps the lives of so many others. Besides, little steps forward are far much better than no steps at all. Be proud of what you are doing, or have been doing, or what you have achieved so far.
2. Do not compare your past experience with the current situation.
This is more so on relationship area.
I know a few people who decided to remain single or unmarried just because of their past’s relationships experiences. Taking precautions is good, but maybe not to that extreme to totally close doors in some areas of your life. It could be there is someone out there for you, if you only give a chance again.
People are different. For instance; the way your old boss treated you it doesn’t mean is what your new boss is going to be treating you.
A while ago I had this old friend of mine who asked me to accompany her to this night club for old time’s sake. And I told her the old me has gone longtime ago, and she has no plans to come back and interfering with the new me. But, if she does come back, it also means she has to fight the new. So, my answer to her was, she should find somebody else.
So, do not compare your past experience with the current situation.
3. Focus on growing yourself, your career, business, and et cetera.
When you focus on your vision, mission, values, dreams and goals, and to be the best you can be, it will help you not to be discouraged by the success of others.
Remember now, success leaves clues. Is there anything you can learn from the people you are comparing yourself to? The answer is yes; the fact that they have been able to achieve what you want to achieve, it’s enough proof that you can also do it if you are willing to learn and grow, persist, and work hard.
Commit yourself to be a lifelong student. We don’t know everything, and there is so much to learn whether it be for our personal growth and development, or becoming better in our relationships, getting ahead in our careers, building our successful businesses and brands, improving our financial education whether it be personal or business finance, I mean, you name it.
Instead of concentrating more on comparing ourselves to others, we can put that energy and invest our time to concentrate more on learning how we can become better than we already are.
4. Just live your life, and be you.
Yes it is true, there is always going to be someone better than us, who is more qualified than us, live a better lifestyle than us, earn more than us, maybe smarter than us, good-looking than us, more spiritual than us, and so on. But does it mean we don’t have a chance in this world, or we are also not special and unique?
Apple, Lenovo. HP, Asus, Toshiba, Dell, and Samsung, and the rest that are in the same industry, all of these big companies and organizations, they produce and manufacture similar products even though their target markets vary. Some of them they target budget friendly customers, some of them they target tech-savvy customers, and so on. But each of these businesses, they still make profit, and still serve, still in the industry today.
When we go to shop for a laptop for instance, they usually have a display for different laptops that have different prices and its features so that we can compare similar products from different brands to make sure we get the best out of our money. Even when we buy online, they usually have a tool that allows customers to compare products according to features, or prices, and etc.
So, if you are a budget friendly, then you will compare the laptops that are in the price range that you can afford. You are not going to buy something that is way too pricey and just because so and so have them, even when you know at the moment you are not in a position to make such a purchase.
Do what you can with what you have when you can. Just live your life and be you. You can compare yourself with others as a way to learn and become better or doing things better, and be the best you can be. Just be careful you don’t go to an extreme.
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