I would like to speak a little bit about my great grandmother Helen (Helena in Swahili) before we continue with our topic of today.
Helena was a mixture of Germany and Masai. She was born during World War II, somewhere between September 1st, 1939 to September 2nd, 1945. During that time, there was a global war, and many nations were affected by it. There was also wars as part of the World War II that were extended even to local areas in Tanzania between Nazi Germany military troops that were stationed in several areas in Tanzania during Germany colonization years. Her mother was Masai from Arusha who had a relationship with one of the Germany soldiers. She got pregnant with him and they had baby Helena during World War II. When she was about two years of age, unfortunately Helena’s parents’ lives were cut short. They were both killed during the World War II by the local people, mainly the Chagga, who managed to kill and defeat the Germans and kick them out of their Moshi and Arusha land. You can say she was killed by her own people because she was in ally and relationship with their enemies. So after her parents died, the Chagga took her and raised her.
Fast forward, when she grew up, she got married to my great grandfather Melchizedek who was also Chagga from Moshi. He had two wives, and she was her first wife. And I asked my Mom, why, what happened? And she said Melchizedek those days in their village was considered to have more money than many men in their town…hahaha, and it was easy to get involved in polygamy if you were consider to be rich.
You see, my great grandmother even after she got married, problems still followed her, she ended up stuck into polygamy lifestyle. She also never knew her real family members, both on her father and mother side. She didn’t even knew Swahili that well, only she knew was the local language that she grew up learning through her adopted family. She was German-Masai, but raised and spoke Chagga, from Moshi.
Why am I sharing about her? I want us today to deal with our inherited marital foundation problems. Some of us unless we resolve and pray against such foundations, they maybe repeatable in our own lives using different circumstances and events in our today. And we will keep asking ourselves, what’s going on here, why all these dramas in our lives? And only to realize it might be we are dealing with foundation problems.
As you can see, I need to pray against such inherited foundation problems myself. My parents got divorced when I was still young, in my early teen years. This is another sad story. But what can you do when it’s beyond you? Life happens sometimes and it can make you dance the songs you don’t want to dance. They both got re-married; on my Dad’s side I have two half-siblings, and my Mom’s side I have five step-siblings. And from both same Mom and Dad, we are six siblings. In conclusion, GOD has blessed us with more members in our families.
So divorce is also one of those things that is part of inherited foundation problems and marriage patterns that some of us we need to pray about. Both divorce and polygamy are not good foundations for our marital destinies. We can also open doors to unnecessary problems into our lives related to the consequences of divorce and polygamy. It can affect us and our children in so many ways; spiritually, emotionally, financially, and it can disturb ourselves and our children direction and perspective about life.
We also see things like premature death, for instance that Helena’s parents went through. Their lives and destinies were cut short. Who knows where would my great grandmother be if her mother and father were together, and alive during her lifetime. Oh well, GOD wanted me to be one of her seeds so that I could write about her someday in one of my series…hahaha.
So we have to pray to GOD to help us escape such fates, because GOD is faithful. The Bible says in the book of James chapter 5 verse 16, “Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective.”
Today we are going to go through lots of Scriptures and learn together. Let’s see what does the Old Testament and New Testament says in the Bible about marriage, divorce, and re-marrying.
In the book of Deuteronomy chapter 24 verses 1 and 4, it says that “Suppose a man marries a woman but she does not please him. Having discovered something wrong with her, he writes a document of divorce, hands it to her, and sends her away from his house. When she leaves his house, she is free to marry another man. But if the second husband also turns against her, writes a document of divorce, hands it to her, and sends her away, or if he dies, the first husband may not marry her again, for she has been defiled. That would be detestable to the LORD. You must not bring guilt upon the land the LORD your GOD is giving you as a special possession.”
In the book of Mark chapter 10 verses 2 to 12, the LORD JESUS said “Some Pharisees came and tried to trap Him with this question: “Should a man be allowed to divorce his wife?” Jesus answered them with a question: “What did Moses say in the law about divorce?” “Well, he permitted it,” they replied. “He said a man can give his wife a written notice of divorce and send her away.” But Jesus responded, “He wrote this commandment only as a concession to your hard hearts. But ‘God made them male and female’ from the beginning of creation. ‘This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.’ Since they are no longer two but one, let no one split apart what God has joined together.” Later, when He was alone with His disciples in the house, they brought up the subject again. He told them, “Whoever divorces his wife and marries someone else commits adultery against her. And if a woman divorces her husband and marries someone else, she commits adultery.”
So we see here the LORD JESUS clearly stated that marriage is to be a permanent bond between one man and one woman. To break it off and marry another is considered to be adultery. And I would like to make a disclaimer; I’m not here to judge. I’m here to learn, and see what GOD’s Will for our lives is, and praying that by His Grace, we will be able to live it, and ask GOD to forgive us if we somehow have already to commit adultery.
I have read online very recently this famous divorce, and it made me sad. What a very kind woman! She was even happily to give the rest of her twenty five divorce settlement to other women…hahaha (just joking). But who knows how many women the man is going to flirt with the rest of her twenty five. She should have authorized that ownership to her children, knowing that after they are mature enough, one of them at least will continue their father legacy. This is what I see. You want your wife to be a little sassy woman, and then tell her, babe or sweetie or honey or wifey, this is what I like. You want her to have little bigger chest; tell her to increase, if she has big, tell her to decrease it. Don’t wait until you have found someone else who has stolen your common sense to take her place. Nowadays if you have cash on your disposal you can increase or decrease them at any size you like, both the tops and bottoms…hahaha. If you want her to go back to School and improve her to cope with your updated status, help her do that, don’t keep quiet until it’s too late. This will help her at least to know that you have changed some of your tastes, and see what both of you can do to make your lives more interesting a little and grow together. Men don’t know even women have secret desires…hahaha. Some women like men with masculine legs; perhaps they look nice on them when they wear Capri. Some women it may not be a physical thing, but perhaps they want men who buy them gifts, may be flowers at least once a month…hahaha. Some women they don’t want to behind, they also want to pursue their dreams and goals, so they appreciate confident men who won’t mind to see them succeeding also. My point is, Love is beyond these things some of us measure them with. You don’t base your decisions onto marry someone because they have nice legs or they buy you luxurious gifts or they are going to put you on Satellite…hahaha. Those are extras things that come with the favor of GOD in your life.
Let’s look at Scriptures and see what is says about marriage criteria. First, we are going to see that according to Scriptures, marriage is a sacred institution; we have to respect and honor it. GOD designed it, and there is nothing earthly that compares to it, and there is nothing in heaven or earth that can change or dismiss it from existing. According to the LORD JESUS, in GOD’s eyes divorce is not HIS Will.
In fact in the book of Hebrews chapter 13 verse 4, Apostle Paul said “Give honor to marriage, and remain faithful to one another in marriage. GOD will surely judge people who are immoral and those who commit adultery.”
But also in the book of Proverbs chapter 6 verse 36, it says that “For a prostitute reduces you to a piece of bread. The adulteress hunts for your precious life.”
And I understand that many people, like my parents, got divorced because they didn’t know better. They saw divorce was their only solution to move on with their lives, therefore they got divorced even after more than twenty years being in a marriage.
Let’s continue and see what else the Bible says about marriage, divorce, and re-marrying.
In the book of Matthew chapter 5 verses 31 and 32, the LORD JESUS said “You have heard the law that says, ‘A man can divorce his wife by merely giving her a written notice of divorce.’ But I say that a man who divorces his wife, unless she has been unfaithful, causes her to commit adultery. And anyone who marries a divorced woman also commits adultery.”
In the book of Matthew chapter 19 verses 3 to 12, it says “Some Pharisees came to Him to test Him. They asked, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any and every reason?” “Haven’t you read,” He replied, “that at the beginning the Creator ‘made them male and female,’ and said, ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh’? So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.” “Why then,” they asked, “did Moses command that a man give his wife a certificate of divorce and send her away?” Jesus replied, “Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning. I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another woman commits adultery.” The disciples said to Him, “If this is the situation between a husband and wife, it is better not to marry.” Jesus replied, “Not everyone can accept this word, but only those to whom it has been given. For there are eunuchs who were born that way, and there are eunuchs who have been made eunuchs by others—and there are those who choose to live like eunuchs for the sake of the Kingdom of heaven. The one who can accept this should accept it.”
We see here the LORD JESUS keeps saying the importance of the permanence of the marriage bond, what GOD has united no man should disunite. But then He said because of the depravity of the human heart, the marriage bond maybe broken under the condition of sexual immorality. I looked online on Google search, and one definition of sexual immorality says “Unlawful sexual intercourse. It includes adultery, prostitution, sexual relations between unmarried individuals, homosexuality, etc.”
But then if you pay attention about what the LORD JESUS said, you will understand why His disciples said “If this is the situation between a husband and wife, it is better not to marry.” Because in Mark 10 verses 11 and 12, the LORD JESUS mentioned that “Whoever divorces his wife and marries someone else commits adultery against her. And if a woman divorces her husband and marries someone else, she commits adultery.” Basically He was saying you can’t escape the adultery sin, unless you decide after you get divorce not to remarry again.
Marriage is sacred. The Bible even talks about the LORD JESUS as being the BrideGroom and the Church as being His Spiritual Bride. We see this mentioned for instance in the Book of March chapter 2 verses 19 and 20. And Scripture says “Jesus replied, “Do wedding guests fast while celebrating with the groom? Of course not. They can’t fast while the groom is with them. But someday the groom will be taken away from them, and then they will fast.”
Another place where it is mentioned for instance is in the Book of John chapter 3 verse 29, where John the Baptist refers himself as a friend or best man who attends the bridegroom. The Scripture says “It is the Bridegroom who marries the bride, and the Bridegroom’s friend is simply glad to stand with Him and hear His vows. Therefore, I am filled with joy at His success.”
We also see it in the book of Ephesians chapter 5 verses 21 to 33, where Apostle Paul explained it very well that marriage is something should be really honored. The Scripture says “Submit to one another out of reverence for CHRIST. Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the LORD. For the husband is the head of the wife as CHRIST is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the SAVIOR. Now as the Church submits to CHRIST, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives, just as CHRIST loved the Church and gave Himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the Word, and to present her to Himself as a radiant Church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as CHRIST does the church— for we are members of His body. “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about CHRIST and the church. However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.”
GOD is not going to allow divorce because the LORD JESUS will never divorce His Church. HE has given us an example of how we should value our marriages and spouses.
From beginning of creation GOD has marriage in mind. If we read the book of Genesis chapter 2 verses 18 to 25, it tells us “The LORD GOD said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.” Now the LORD GOD had formed out of the ground all the wild animals and all the birds in the sky. He brought them to the man to see what he would name them; and whatever the man called each living creature, that was its name. So the man gave names to all the livestock, the birds in the sky and all the wild animals. But for Adam no suitable helper was found. So the LORD GOD caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, He took one of the man’s ribs and then closed up the place with flesh. Then the LORD GOD made a woman from the rib He had taken out of the man, and He brought her to the man. The man said, “This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called ‘woman,’ for she was taken out of man.” That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh. Adam and his wife were both naked, and they felt no shame.”
In the book of Proverbs 18 verse 22, it also says “The man who finds a wife finds a treasure, and he receives favor from the LORD.” Remember now, it didn’t say a woman, it says a wife.
Not only that, in the book of Proverbs chapter 19 verse 14, it says “Fathers can give their sons an inheritance of houses and wealth, but only the LORD can give an understanding wife.”
Finding our GOD-given spouses has nothing to do of our looks, age, or income. Yes, it’s important to be attracted to your spouse on the things of the outside, but in the spiritual realm it has little or no significance. If your spouse comes with those things that is great for you.
Let’s read more Scriptures in the Bible and see what it says.
In the book 2 Corinthians chapter 6 verses 14 to 18, it says that “Don’t team up with those who are unbelievers. How can righteousness be a partner with wickedness? How can light live with darkness? What harmony can there be between Christ and the devil? How can a believer be a partner with an unbeliever? And what union can there be between GOD’s temple and idols? For we are the temple of the living GOD. As GOD said: “I will live in them and walk among them. I will be their GOD and they will be My people. Therefore, come out from among unbelievers, and separate yourselves from them, says the LORD. Don’t touch their filthy things, and I will welcome you. And I will be your FATHER, and you will be My sons and daughters, says the LORD ALMIGHTY.”
What we just read says that don’t just marry anybody. In fact in the following Scriptures we will see that how Abraham knew about it that GOD hated unequally yoked people together in marriages with unbelievers. When it was time for his son Isaac to get married, Abraham sent his servant with a strict instruction to get a wife for his son.
In the book of Genesis chapter 24 verses 1 to 18, the Bible records “Abraham was now a very old man, and the LORD had blessed him in every way. One day Abraham said to his oldest servant, the man in charge of his household, “Take an oath by putting your hand under my thigh. Swear by the LORD, the GOD of heaven and earth, that you will not allow my son to marry one of these local Canaanite women. Go instead to my homeland, to my relatives, and find a wife there for my son Isaac.” The servant asked, “But what if I can’t find a young woman who is willing to travel so far from home? Should I then take Isaac there to live among your relatives in the land you came from?” “No!” Abraham responded. “Be careful never to take my son there. For the LORD, the GOD of heaven, Who took me from my father’s house and my native land, solemnly promised to give this land to my descendants. He will send His angel ahead of you, and He will see to it that you find a wife there for my son. If she is unwilling to come back with you, then you are free from this oath of mine. But under no circumstances are you to take my son there.”
In the book of 1 Kings chapter 11 verses 1 to 13, the Bible records that “Now King Solomon loved many foreign women. Besides Pharaoh’s daughter, he married women from Moab, Ammon, Edom, Sidon, and from among the Hittites. The LORD had clearly instructed the people of Israel, “You must not marry them, because they will turn your hearts to their gods.” Yet Solomon insisted on loving them anyway. He had 700 wives of royal birth and 300 concubines. And in fact, they did turn his heart away from the LORD. In Solomon’s old age, they turned his heart to worship other gods instead of being completely faithful to the LORD his GOD, as his father, David, had been. Solomon worshiped Ashtoreth, the goddess of the Sidonians, and Molech, the detestable god of the Ammonites. In this way, Solomon did what was evil in the LORD’s sight; he refused to follow the LORD completely, as his father, David, had done. On the Mount of Olives, east of Jerusalem, he even built a pagan shrine for Chemosh, the detestable god of Moab, and another for Molech, the detestable god of the Ammonites. Solomon built such shrines for all his foreign wives to use for burning incense and sacrificing to their gods. The LORD was very angry with Solomon, for his heart had turned away from the LORD, the GOD of Israel, Who had appeared to him twice. He had warned Solomon specifically about worshiping other gods, but Solomon did not listen to the LORD’s command. So now the LORD said to him, “Since you have not kept My Covenant and have disobeyed My Decrees, I will surely tear the kingdom away from you and give it to one of your servants. But for the sake of your father, David, I will not do this while you are still alive. I will take the kingdom away from your son. And even so, I will not take away the entire kingdom; I will let him be king of one tribe, for the sake of My servant David and for the sake of Jerusalem, My chosen city.”
Marriage is an important covenant and must not be taken lightly in any way, shape, or form. If you miss in marriage, you may miss heaven, and your generation after you may miss GOD’s blessings that GOD had in-store for them.
GOD Almighty doesn’t want us to worship other gods apart from or other than HIM. GOD Almighty wants to have children raised knowing HIM and follow HIS righteous ways of living.
So don’t grab the first man or woman just comes your way. We can ask GOD in prayer to find our GOD-given spouses and bring them to us just like He did for Adam and Eve. And while we wait on Him to do that on His timing, we must be willing to allow GOD to shape and mold us into that godly and righteously image that GOD has for both of us. GOD is a perfect match-maker. He knows your weaknesses and strengths, and He will bring someone to complement you, your missing rib…hahaha. He said in the book of Genesis, it is not good for a man to be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him.
Some of us we really need to pray, because we could be stuck in some kind of inherited marital problems. And unless we pray to GOD to intervene, we may repeat the same mistakes our ancestors did or where victimized with.
As usually, we are going to pray for ourselves, and our GOD-given spouses wherever they maybe, and ask GOD to help us and intervene in our marital destinies and those of our loved ones.
- HEAVENLY FATHER, in the Name Of YOUR SON JESUS CHRIST, we ask YOU HOLY FATHER, to release to us, our spouses that YOU have been prepared us for, from wherever they may be right now, in the MIGHTY Name Of JESUS CHRIST. FATHER GOD, we believe YOU have created us for our special spouses, please bring them to us, and place them on our paths, this we pray in the MIGHTY NAME of JESUS CHRIST.
- If our spouses are not born-again, HEAVENLY FATHER, we call our spouses out of obscurities into a life in YOUR SON JESUS CHRIST. Oh LORD Our GOD, let YOUR choice for us for our spouses be a person that loves YOU wholeheartedly and help us be the same. HOLY FATHER, just as Abraham sent his servant to find a wife for his son Isaac, please let YOUR HOLY SPIRIT helps us locate, find, and bring our spouses to us, this we pray in the MIGHTY NAME of JESUS CHRIST.
- HOLY FATHER, give us patience to wait until the right person comes. And while we are waiting GOD, help us continue to seek YOU and all YOUR Righteousness, and continue to do it always even until YOU give us our spouses, this we pray in the MIGHTY NAME Of JESUS CHRIST.
- HEAVENLY FATHER, please send also YOUR mighty angels to fight and release our spouses wherever they are. Please let all satanic barriers keeping us from meeting be resolved immediately, this we pray in the MIGHTY NAME Of JESUS CHRIST.
- LORD, we reject and rebuke counterfeit spouses from the enemy in the MIGHTY NAME Of JESUS CHRIST. Every evil marriage in our lives be consumed by the HOLY SPIRIT FIRE. Let every token of every evil marriage that we maybe in that we are not aware of be destroyed and consumed by the FIRE Of The HOLY SPIRIT, this we pray in the MIGHTY NAME Of THE LORD JESUS CHRIST.
- HEAVENLY FATHER, please remove every negative thing in our lives and their lives. And every inherited marriage pattern that is not of YOU, HOLY FATHER let it be removed from us immediately, in the MIGHTY NAME Of JESUS CHRIST. We cut off and break any inherited marital problems in our lives, in the MIGHTY NAME Of JESUS CHRIST. We terminate the flow of any inherited marital problems, whether it be divorce, whether it be finding wrong spouses, we terminate it and break it immediately in our lives, in the MIGHTY NAME Of JESUS CHRIST.
- HEAVENLY FATHER, we break and destroy the chains of marital stagnancy in our lives in the MIGHTY NAME Of JESUS CHRIST. PRECIOUS HOLY SPIRIT OF GOD, please Arise in YOUR MIGHTY POWER and give us our breakthroughs, this we pray in the MIGHTY NAME Of JESUS CHRIST. HOLY FATHER, please wipe our names from the book of marital stagnancy as of today, this we pray in The MIGHTY NAME Of JESUS CHRIST.
- Every evil spiritual marriage contending with our marriages and our marital destinies be consumed by The FIRE Of The LORD JESUS CHRIST! We destroy every evil marital plans plotted against us in the MIGHTY NAME Of JESUS CHRIST. May nothing hinder our breakthroughs anymore, we break every wall standing between us and our GOD-given spouses, this we pray in the MIGHTY NAME Of JESUS CHRIST.
- HEAVENLY FATHER, please silence every voice of our past sins that the enemy maybe using to bring hindrances into our marital breakthroughs, in the MIGHTY NAME Of JESUS CHRIST. LORD, please forgive our sins and let them not be the hindrances to the answers of our prayers, this we pray in the MIGHTY NAME Of JESUS CHRIST.
- If there is any satanic evil offerings that was made for us or our spouses, HEAVENLY FATHER, let it be removed now, in the MIGHTY NAME Of JESUS CHRIST. May the BLOOD Of JESUS, the FIRE Of GOD, and The BREATH and PRESENCE Of GOD remove such evil sacrifices and offerings immediately in the MIGHTY NAME Of JESUS CHRIST.
- We command to break free from every witchcraft intimidation from our enemies and our spouses’ enemies, in the MIGHTY NAME Of JESUS CHRIST. We cancel and terminate manipulation of our households’ wickedness, evil spiritual husbands, and any anti-marriage evil forces against our lives, in the MIGHTY NAME Of JESUS CHRIST. PRECIOUS HOLY SPIRIT, contend with our contenders. Please remove every evil force and witchcraft that is hindering our marital destinies, this we pray in the MIGHTY NAME Of JESUS CHRIST.
- HEAVENLY FATHER, let YOUR CONSUMING FIRE And The BLOOD Of JESUS CHRIST purge and remove every hidden ancestral curse in our lives, let it be destroyed completely now, in The MIGHTY NAME Of JESUS CHRIST. LORD, remove all negative and evil foundations away from us, our spouses, our children, our families, and all our loved ones, this we pray in the MIGHTY NAME Of JESUS CHRIST.
- And for me personally, I collect back every benefit I would have benefited if I would have gotten married earlier in my life. I claim what was stolen from me in full. HOLY FATHER, just you have restored Job to what he lost, I claim all the benefits that was stolen from me through marital delay, in the MIGHTY NAME Of JESUS CHRIST. HEAVENLY FATHER, I also decree and pray to be the first and only wife, and true lover for my spouse. May we grow old together until YOU take us to be with YOU, in JESUS MIGHTY NAME. No woman or man, spiritually or physically shall take my place in my husband’s life and my place in my children’s lives, this I pray in The MIGHTY NAME Of JESUS CHRIST. I cancel all premature deaths appointments and attacks along our paths in the MIGHTY NAME Of JESUS CHRIST. Oh LORD my GOD, establish my marriage, family, and home according to Scriptures, and YOUR WILL. I cover this prayer with the BLOOD Of JESUS, The PRESENCE and BREATH Of GOD, and The CONSUMING FIRE Of GOD, in JESUS MIGHTY NAME. THANK HOLY FATHER. IN JESUS MIGHTY NAME We have prayed. Amen
Helen Majaga is a founder of Helen Majaga International, Live to Your Full Potential Podcast & YouCount Magazine, specializing in the training and development of individuals and businesses to achieve personal and professional goals.
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